DRIVER'S SIDE DIATRIBE
This is the time of year when peoples’ spirits are perhaps at their best — that period between Halloween and New Year’s. For all the hustle and bustle there still doesn’t seem to be the angst there usually is when times are just ordinarily busy.
However, for all the frivolity that’s prevalent during these too-few weeks there’s also a period of stress, when one little thing could rotate the earth on a different axis and we’re liable to find ourselves headed towards Uranus. I’m of course referring to the infamous first snow of the season, and the resultant breakout of steering wheel Alzheimer’s.
Quickly…name two things that are the main obstacles between you buying a car you’d really like to have and the reality of what you wound up buying; time is up, Cicero. The correct answer is: money! Now let’s carry this one step further; if money were no object, what kind of car would you have. I’ve asked myself this question and in no particular order I’ve listed them below. 
Talk about a kumbaya moment. That word “optimism” epitomizes the start of each year in the auto industry. It’s January and the domestic auto show season continues with the North American International Auto Show in Detroit, then to Chicago in February, heading East at Easter-time to New York and then a long break until the Los Angeles show in November when it starts all over again. 
As most of you know one of my biggest gripes in life are those drivers who do not use turn signals. If I had my way about it anybody who does not use turn signals should be sent to Chernobyl to enjoy the facility’s famous warm baths and be waited on hand and foot – which if legend has it will be the last identifiable body parts left after a two-lap swim of its Olympic-sized pools. 
When I was growing up in Indiana there was only so many times you could tip over a cow, make out at Bartz’s Woods or eat a “Pig’s Dinner” at Brownie’s Drive-In. So creative juices flowed, and out of this mind-searching came a trend of naming one’s car. 
For some time now it seems that “retro” has worked its way into the U.S. vernacular. Actually it has been around since there was something before — it. Automobile-wise there was a trilogy of retro cars that came out about the same time several years ago; Mustang, Challenger and Camaro. They all bore some resemblance to the same nameplates of the 60s and 70s — some more than others. 
If you’re anything like me you’re sick of somebody else always trying to tell you enough is enough. Who died and put them in charge? It seems to begin at childhood when you’re sitting at the dinner table and decide you want more potatoes. Your mother tells you, “You’ve had enough.” Years later you’re sitting in front of the television watching your favorite situation comedy and your father comes in and says, “You’ve had enough television for one day, Junior. Go to your room and read a book.” You get the picture; when is it your turn to call the shots?
As an auto writer with a substantial readership I’m invited to a lot of programs that highlight future products. Some involve technology and some involve design. But the common thread of all these is the excitement generated by the manufacturers over their new “things.” 
